Day 2 of the Blog a Day in May Challenge.
Something that I’m really good at.
art, crafts, sewing, writing, cooking…, I can even sing! And I used to be a
pretty good dancer (swing dancing, if I had a good leading partner!) But I’m not
a super star at any of those things. What am I really good at? I think I’m best
at being a mom, but that’s not something I can teach. At least not completely in one post! After some thought, and
reflecting on my condensed life story post from yesterday, I’ve decided what I’m really best at is:
(oh the suspense…)
struggling with depression most of her life! Yes, I still battle with
depression sometimes, mainly when my hormones are shifting, but I can recognize
it coming on and change my way of thinking so it doesn’t take me into despair.
It makes me work harder for the good times and I then appreciate them
so much more.
So, this is my recipe for happiness:
How to Be Happy:
None of us can see, do, or accomplish everything there is to. So take your time
and enjoy the things you have
accomplished. The beauty you see around you now. The things you can do now,
that you take for granted.
success? I am not wealthy, I’m in a tiny house, living month to month, with no
career (at least not one that can yet support my family), but is making money, having a
top career, or high social status my drive? No.
warm bed, running water, more than enough food and clothes, (there are plenty that can’t
even say that!) But I have so much more; a wonderful husband, two beautiful
kids, friends, and family! I can work harder (in a different way) for more, and I will, but I can still be happy right where I am today.
I gave up my career in medical coding to spend this time with my kids while
they’re little. It goes so fast and I know I could never get it back. Do you think
they’ll remember about their childhood that we didn’t have the nicest
furniture? Or the time we spent learning, playing, and laughing together?
much pressure to be the best. To flaunt those bright colorful feathers and
strut. Well I am the best even if I am a plain little bird. I’m the best wife
and mom I know how to be. I am raising my kids to live their dreams, find their
own passions in life and not conform to what society says they should be. I
have become comfortable not needing to put on a show and prove my success to anyone.
if I choose to. Not because I have to
have nicer furniture. Those are just material things.
Relationships with my family, following my own passions in art and writing, raising
my kids to love, respect, care about our world and others, and find true
happiness is what matters most to me.
long I cried over the past, longed for things to have been different or hurts
to have never happened. But they did and it’s over. There’s no going back, only
forward. So why focus on that? Yes, it still hurts even now sometimes, but you
are what you make yourself. Not what you’ve come from.
the worst circumstances but decide now not to fill your heart with anger and
resentment. To let those experiences make you stronger and smarter and then let
them go. Take a deep breath in and then breathe out all those bad feelings. Hike
to the top of a hill and yell them out if that helps. Sing them, paint them,
talk them, or write them out and then burn the journal. Whatever it takes for you
to get it out and move on.
make anything they did right; it’s just you letting it no longer have power
over you. It’s for your own freedom.
a worry-wort myself. But some things will happen as they happen, and worrying
too much about them just causes you stress and does nothing to help the
situation. Find something that works to calm your nerves; practice deep,
relaxing breathing, listen to soothing music, avoid the news, violent movies, or
whatever you recognize as contributing to your worries or anxiety. For myself I
avoid very depressing news, music, movies, and books, though they may come
highly recommended. I just know I have to do that for myself.
pleasures: Savor that sip of coffee in the morning. Stop to burn into memory your child’s
smile, that was just for you, before they run off again. Listen
to the music of birds and crickets. Feel the warm sand or grass under your
toes. Savor the sunset and quiet while you drive home in traffic. Appreciate
that you walk pain free when you have to stand in a long line at the store. Listen
to the great composers and give art that you pass a moment of appreciation.
Little by little you will fill yourself up with good thoughts, great tiny moments
to look forward to each day, and train yourself to recognize more and more
wonders around you.
more! Be silly! Don’t worry about what others think and run around with your
kids! Make faces and spend more time just being with them and enjoying their
personalities. Don’t let a wrinkle, rip, spill, or mess ruin your whole day.
Ease up and relax. Enjoy life. It’s the only one you have and it’s passing you
can make you feel happy more than when you make someone else happy! Whether
they deserve it or not, give someone a flower, write a note with a white board
marker on the mirror for your kids or spouse. Put a little treat for them to
find somewhere, in their lunch or on their pillow. Give more compliments; tell
a stranger you like her blouse or hair, it could be the one thing that made her
Give extra change to the person in line behind you. If you can, find causes
that are meaningful to you and help any way you can. (See my Get Involved page for quick, easy, many
even free, ways to get you started caring about someone other than you). We are here
to help each other in this world and this is the most fulfilling type of work
you can do.
to people you pass. Judge less. Don’t compare your life to others.
I am far from perfect, I lose my temper, yell at my kids more than I care to admit, forget to do all these things I listed, but I try. And it really has led me to be the happiest I’ve ever been!
important to you and what truly makes you happy and go after it.
scared. Even if no one else understands. You need to do what is right for your
life and your happiness.